‘Before educating the daughter, grandparents will have to be taught’: Actress Neena Gupta said – Girls’ lives have not changed, veil is still used in 98% of the houses.




Bollywood actress Neena Gupta said that the reality is far different from what is talked about the status of women in the society. Even today, the thinking towards girls has not changed in most of the houses in the country. He said that before giving the slogan of Beti Padhao, Beti Bachao, grandparents will have to do the work of educating, only then the girl child will be truly saved. Neena Gupta said this in the ‘Dialogue on Mental Wellness’ program organized at Hotel Lalit, Jaipur. During this, he wrote his autobiography ‘Sach Hoon Toh’ and spoke openly on family, status of women, parenting, relationships, mental health and his life experiences. When I did not have work, anyone would write anything about me. Neena Gupta said that the idea of ​​writing her autobiography came about 25 years ago. Initially, when I did not have work, I had no value, so anyone would write anything about me. Then I felt that no one knows how I really am. So I thought I would write about how I really am. She told that initially she had taken advance to write the book, but could not muster the courage. I wanted to write about mom, dad, brother and their family. He had kept his truth hidden his entire life. I felt that I had no right to expose their lives. Whenever I started writing, I used to think that mom will feel bad, dad will feel bad, brother will feel bad and I used to stop. ‘Covid gave me courage, because now there was no fear of anyone’ She said that the book could be completed only when she stayed in her hill house for six months during Covid. By then almost everyone in my family had left this world. Then I had no fear of anyone. Because we fear our own people the most. I am more afraid of my daughter than God. Neena admitted that she did not write everything in her book too. He said that I did not write lies, but I did not write everything either. I hid things about some people because I felt that it would not be good for my daughter Masaba, my husband or some other people. I didn’t want to take revenge from anyone. I had a chance to write about the people who wronged me, but I restrained myself. He laughingly said that the publisher’s lawyers had even asked him to change almost everyone’s name. ‘I fight with God and also thank him’ Talking about mental health, Neena said that she opens her mind to God. I thank God at least ten times a day. When I lie down on my white sheets at night, the first thing I say is ‘Thank you’. And when I get angry, I scold God. There is some power which is bigger than me. I talk to him only. On the situation of women, he said that some change is visible in cities, but the situation in villages and small towns is still the same. We are probably talking about one-two percent of the population. The rest of the place is still veiled, feet have to be touched, service has to be done. Not much has changed. Neena narrated the story of Panchayat webseries and shared her experience of a village in Madhya Pradesh during the shooting of Panchayat. He said that I asked a girl what do you study? His mother said- She is studying, but will get married as soon as she turns 18. Then she will wear the veil, take care of the house, and give birth to children. This is happening even today. He said that merely educating the girl child will not bring about change. I told one of my friends that before ‘Educate your daughter, save your daughter’, educate your grandparents. Unless their thinking changes, even if their daughter studies, she will be asked to wash the utensils. ‘Don’t get angry at children, talk to them with love’. Referring to his relationship with his daughter Masaba, he said that with time he himself learned a lot. Earlier I used to say – If you don’t want to go, then don’t go. Then the answer was – I will go. Later she realized that if I say the same thing lovingly, Son, I don’t feel right about this… the rest is your decision, she thought to herself. He said that children learn what their parents do. One day I told my daughter not to shout. He replied- You also scream. Then I understood that children repeat what they see us doing. In the program ‘My focus shifted from work to relationships’, he openly introspected about his career. She said that if my focus had been right, I could have reached greater heights. There came a time when my focus went more on finding a good life partner than work. I think that was my biggest mistake. Many times, women’s focus shifts from their career to finding a husband. Like Arjun, if you just keep your eyes on the goal, you will definitely reach your destination. ‘Today’s generation is very confused’ On the mental condition of the youth, he said that today’s generation is the most confused. I’m working with a lot of young girls. She says good boys are not found. Going on dating apps, but having trouble there too. On the other hand, boys would also say that good girls are not available. This generation is very confused. There are old ideas in the house and very modern thinking outside. In such a situation, they do not understand what is right. At the end of the program he said that setbacks are necessary in life. No one can teach how to live life. Everyone’s problems are different. One has to learn from experience. If you want to reach the top, you will have to fall. No one moves forward without falling.



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